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The National Domestic Violence Hotline: www. Domestic violence can happen to anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion or gender. It can happen to couples who are married, living together or who are dating.

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Domestic violence affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels. Abuse is a repetitive pattern of behaviors to maintain power and control over an intimate partner. These are behaviors that physically harm, arouse fear, prevent a partner from doing what they wish or force them to behave in ways they do not want.

Abuse includes the use of physical and sexual violence, threats and intimidation, emotional abuse and economic deprivation. Many of these different forms of abuse can be going on at any one time. View image larger. It can vary from being egged on and persuaded, to being forced to have contact.

It can be verbal and emotional, in the form of statements that make you feel pressure, guilt, or shame. You can also be made to feel forced through more subtle actions. For example, an abusive partner:.

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Dating someone, being in a relationship, or being married never means that you owe your partner intimacy of any kind. Gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people experience domestic abuse at the same rate as heterosexual women. This can leave LGBTQ people who suffer from domestic violence especially isolated and at risk of further abuse.

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Sometimes the abuse looks similar to that experienced by heterosexual women: emotional bullying, physical aggression, threats to harm the victim or other loved ones, social isolation, control of finances, extreme jealousy.

There are additional features that can be present in LGBTQ intimate partner violence that do not factor into heterosexual relationships.

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The abuser may use the close-knit dynamic of the gay and lesbian community and the lack of support for LGBTQ people outside the community to further pressure the victim into compliance. Welcome to Merced College We are glad you are here! Need a Counselor?

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For example, an abusive partner: Making you feel like you owe them — ex. Why do victims return to or stay with abusers?

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Abusers work very hard to keep victims in relationships. There is a real fear of death or more abuse if they leave. On average, three women die at the hands of a current or former intimate partner every day.

We, as a community, must do more to ensure the safety of victims when they leave. Batterers are very good at making victims think that the abuse is their fault. Victims often believe that if they caused the violence, they can also stop it. Victims stay because they are made to think they cannot survive on their own, financially or otherwise.

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Often abusers create a financial situation that makes leaving nearly impossible. Survivors sometimes want the abuse to end, not the relationship. When a spouse or intimate partner uses physical violence, threats, emotional abuse, harassment, or stalking to control the behavior of their partners, they are committing domestic violence Develop a Safety Plan. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, develop a safety plan. This may include setting aside an extra pair of keys, money, passports, etc.

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Know where you can go ahead of time once leaving your home. Try to remember the crisis hotlines, as they can assist you at any time. Call Domestic violence is a crime.

If you or someone you know is being battered, call immediately for help. Exercise your rights. You and anyone you know who may be experiencing domestic violence have the right to go to court and petition for an order of protection. There are shelters dedicated to victims of domestic violence.

If not choosing a shelter, do call the crisis hotline to assist you. They are here specifically to aid in your needs. Remember, no one deserves abuse and there is no excuse for domestic violence.